I’m better at this than I thought

My goal last night was to get one guy’s phone number.

I was pretty occupied last night because of a sticky situation that I somehow got myself into involving a married man (I’ll give you the deets in my next post), and he and his wife stuck around at the show a lot longer than I’d anticipated. It was about 11:30 when they left, and I didn’t have any prospects. There was a cute bearded guy that I wanted to talk to, but I couldn’t get him to look at me, and by the time I had a free second, he’d gotten up and left. Plus he seemed to be having some sort of intense conversation with a male friend. Wouldn’t want to interrupt that.

Finally, a sighting!

My two friends and I headed out on the dance floor (the band was a surfer-rock/rockabilly group so it was perfect dancing music!) and danced around for a bit. I had told my friend M about my goal for the evening, and she was all for it. As we were dancing, she pointed out a guy sitting at the bar behind me, “He’s really cute,” she said. I glanced over my shoulder at him. He looked at me. I smiled then looked away. I did this a couple more times over the course of a few minutes.

Then I said to my friends, “I’m going to get another beer,” and walked over to the bar next to him. He started talking to me right away. I didn’t even need a segue. He said something like, “Getting a beer?” I refrained from being a smartass and saying, “No, I was just coming over here to lean on the bar. Here’s your sign.” I suppose, though, I didn’t actually want another beer, I was in fact just coming over to lean on the bar and talk to a cute guy, so my smartassery would have been moot.

Anyway, he bought my beer, and then asked if I wanted to go sit on the patio where we could talk.

Patio Chatter and being coquettish

One thing I’m very good at – so I’ve discovered – is playing the coquette. I’m very aware of my face, actions, hair and eyes. So I know how to give a flirtatious, slightly shy smile. I’ve mastered the “look away shyly” and the “corner of the eyes glance”. Talking to this guy was actually sort of weird because I felt like I was acting the whole time. And honestly, talking to someone for the first time kind of is acting.

Raised in the South

I’ve always gotten very nervous in social situations. When I was younger, my mother, who is from Southern Georgia, used to tell me the best thing to do in social situations is to take a deep breath, let it out, and tell yourself everything will be OK. I’ve seen my mother do that so many times, that I’ve picked it up from her. First she breathes in deeply, presses her lips together, then she smooths down her dress with both hands as she lets out her breath and puts a big, genuine smile on her face. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from my southern upbringing, it’s that a smile diffuses any situation.

And the verdict

At the end of the night, I actually left with not one, but two guys’ numbers. To be fair, one of them was a childhood friend that I hadn’t seen or talked to in years, coincidentally living in the same city as me! The other guy was the one from the bar. I gave him my number and he sent me a text message that said: “You are so cute it hurts my teeth.”

Mission Accomplished.


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